davidji's Blog

davidji's Blog

Squashing Our Inner Blame Game (and awakening self-acceptance)

Hello, spiritual warriors! Welcome to this week’s edition of The Source.

So often, we hold ourselves accountable for all the pitfalls and unhappiness in our lives, and we point to some decision we made that was the root of it all.

But this is unnecessary and harsh. And building up the blame case has no value except in a courtroom. In the real world, where a judge or jury of our momentary choices doesn’t exist, attributing blame only gets in the way of making the best decision in this moment. Especially self-blame because that is also self-defeating. It takes the wind out of our sails, and that doesn’t help us in any way.

In business, in history, in politics and in sports, the stakes are so high that the ability to step beyond the moment of blame and accept our individual missteps, mistakes and misspeaks separates the winners from the losers.

The ability to accept the fact that we did our best from our own level of consciousness at the time, separates those willing to step out of the past, which is the stale, the old, the stuck; and into the present, which is rich, fresh, and filled with infinite opportunities. Those mired in self-pity or finger-pointing are trapped in the past and destined to stay there because they will not accept what is already carved in stone. They remain paralyzed in self-finger-pointing mode and that becomes their excuse for why they are unfulfilled.

Those who have owned and accepted their decisions (even the poor ones) are able to move forward and make new, proud, exciting, restorative choices.

We can keep complaining about the rain, or accept that it’s raining and find an umbrella.

We get to choose. We are choice-making beings. No one can ever take that away from us—not even ourselves. We just need a little reminder now and then.

Peace. -davidji

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