Struggling with Forgiveness? Here's How to Lighten Your Heart - davidji

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Struggling with Forgiveness? Here’s How to Lighten Your Heart

Welcome to this week’s edition of The Source!!!

The Divine Principle of One teaches that nothing on this earth ever really ends; we must make peace in our own hearts, forgive ourselves, forgive them, and the key to this is to release, release, release.

Forgiveness has very little to do with the other person—it comes from within. The ancient teachings remind us that when we forgive, we free ourselves from the threads that connect us to the one who hurt us. So start to loosen your grip on those threads.

The Ripples of Your Heart

The Sacred Power of Your Ripple is fueled by four basic needs that are in constant dynamic exchange as we move through our lives – attention, affection, appreciation, and acceptance. Every day, we consciously and unconsciously, flow these ripples out into the world and receive them back in an infinite give-and-take that determines how we feel about ourselves, how others feel about us, how we interact with the world around us, and how it interacts with us. These four ripples of the heart set the tone for every encounter you will ever experience – with yourself, others, and the environment.

Attention

We all want to be seen. We all want to be looked at. We struggle so hard to receive eye contact even if it’s fleeting. This is where we get validated for simply existing. We sense it. We value it. We need it. And every one you interact with needs it too.

Attention is the starting point for the Sacred Power of Your Ripple. It’s the “I see you” moment.

Affection

A bit deeper than attention is affection. We all want to receive a physical display of that validation—a wink, a nod, a smile, a hug, a kiss, a squeeze, or a kind word. It distills that distant attention we crave down to a level of closeness, where we experience someone’s warmth or fondness for us.

The Sacred Power of Your Ripple has the ability to flow affection throughout the world at the basic level of kindness and the deeper expression of love.

Appreciation

One step deeper than affection is appreciation—moving from a kind word or gesture to genuine gratitude. We all want to be thanked, recognized, and acknowledged. We all want to feel that we have added value to the moment, task, project, or mission at hand.

Appreciation is more overt or public acknowledgment of a good deed, a job well done, or an important contribution. And yet, it can be as simple as a “thank you” from a stranger when you held the door open for them. When you demonstrate appreciation, you elevate another’s sense of self-worth.

Miraculously, this also elevates your own!

Areas of our life where we don’t feel appreciated cause us extreme struggle and result in a wide range of emotions.

Right now there is probably something you worked hard on, or a gift you gave someone and you did not receive the thanks or gratitude you were expecting. And now it haunts you. This little irritant resting under the surface can influence and impact your daily anxiety, anger, or irritation. Multiply that by the thousands of little ripples you are sending out into the world, and you can see the impact of the Sacred Power of Your Ripple on every relationship in your life.

The Ripple of Appreciation

We are rippling in every moment. Humans are totally dependent on the feedback of their friends, siblings, parents, teachers, co-workers, bosses, and everyone else with whom they come into contact.

Every decision we make is done with the hope of some level of acknowledgment that we’ve added value.

Every one of us still craves the ripple of appreciation. It’s our external validator that we are connected to and making a difference in the lives of others. If we don’t receive that validation, it can scar us forever. And when you don’t flow the ripple of appreciation, it can wound another eternally as well.

Why not say how you feel? What’s the worst that could happen? What’s the best that could happen?

Acceptance

Our need for acceptance drives so many of our daily and life decisions. We need to feel the ripple of someone or something bigger than us. We crave this acceptance – in the grandest ways and in the smaller moments. Being invited, included, and – most importantly – being welcomed relentlessly influence our sense of worthiness.

When we were younger, we based our self-worth on whether we were accepted into various groups based on our internal assessment of how cool, relevant, or popular the group was. That hasn’t changed. Our need for support and respect from those we respect can be a powerful driving force in our lives.

Nowadays, we do this with our affiliations to schools, clubs, sports teams, religious groups, social media, political parties, nationalities, ethnicities, and cultures—it’s all about being accepted. Many of us crave acceptance so deeply that we secretly value being accepted by people we don’t even like!

When we don’t “feel” acceptance, we spend a lot of time stuck in “poor me” mode, where the power of our ripple slows to a drip. We respond to the world by feeling “less-than”—we isolate ourselves, act desperate, or behave resentfully regarding our lack of inclusion.

In time this devolves into an antagonistic and ultimately victimized attitude where our ripple stops entirely. We can spend decades trapped in the world of not feeling accepted.

So when we don’t receive the attention, affection, appreciation, or acceptance that is our birthright, we feel shame, anger, jealousy, schadenfreude (delighting in some one else’s struggle), even vengeance. That’s putting a lot of power in the hands of others. But, even worse, it paints the seed of your ripple with desperate or negative vibrations.

Feeling accepted and demonstrating acceptance of others elevates you to a higher vibration of positivity and reinforces your humanity.

Your Voice

The Sacred Power of Your Ripple flows through infinity; but it starts with you.

Why would you expect someone else to be accepting of you, if you don’t fully accept yourself?

We need to make a daily commitment to accept ourselves in every moment; to be kind to ourselves; to appreciate ourselves. That’s truly the only validation we need. And this begins with you truly understanding your voice.

When we think of our voice, we often view it as the words that come out of our mouth. But this is just the vibration of our vocal cords. Your voice is much more expansive than simply words—it’s the energy you flow in every moment and the ripple of that energy.

We “speak” in verbal and nonverbal ways—from the choices we’ve made to the messages we send— to the divine purpose that holds our stars apart and our Universe together.

Some of us have dimmed our light over fear of being diminished by another – biting our tongues or walking on eggshells because we don’t have the confidence to risk being judged. Some of us feel listened to – but don’t feel heard. That’s usually because we believe the other person isn’t being present while we are expressing ourselves. So sometimes we just quit . . . we just shut down. No more!

The Sacred Power of Your Ripple invites you to shout your magnificence from every rooftop; to stop dimming your light and turn it up brighter; to say what’s on your mind; to do what feels true in the moment; to risk failure; to express yourself from your heart; and to let your passion flow.

You can express your voice through your physical appearance; through your job or your career; through your hobbies, interests, and causes; through your writings, posts, creations, and performances; and through the daily energy you flow into the world.

Expressing yourself physically, emotionally, and verbally is a very important aspect of the Sacred Power of Your Ripple. Each of us desperately needs to be heard in some way. Many of us feel the need to compel, convince, persuade, or convert others. Some of us just want what’s inside of us to be witnessed by another. We are beings of expression and knowing someone is “listening” helps validate that we have meaning in this life.

Peace. -davidji

3 thoughts on “Struggling with Forgiveness? Here’s How to Lighten Your Heart”

  1. Dear David,
    It’s once more an impressive and enlightening post.. Philosophical and wise but very down to earth and very helpful.
    Thank you very much 🦋🙏

  2. Dear DavidJi,
    I love your weekly posts but what impressed me so much about this one was that you were honest about holding a grudge. Often times, we believe that our teachers are past all this kind of stuff or beyond getting triggered. Your honesty was greatly appreciated

  3. Gracias amigo, spoken so fully and beautifully, once again. It resonates with what I am seeking and speaking, once again. It reminds me to be mindful of my ripples in a greater way yet, as I OWN MY IMPACT and watch the little miracles that can appear, even with appreciation alone.
    I have noted in my book today: Sacred Power of Ripples of my Heart: Attention, Affection, Appreciation, Acceptance.
    I have written all of these in my handwriting, in my voice.
    And all of these with my purple pen, with which I am still connected to you and a growing Pod of Purple Pen Peeps.
    Blessings and Gratitude from Diane -and Lucie-the-cat

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