Throughout the history of music, there have basically been two kinds of songs: those about when love is filling your heart and those about heartbreak and the heartache that follows. That’s because falling in love and having our hearts broken are the inevitable consequences of being human. Our hearts rise and fall as we attach to and detach from the things we love. And with the ebb and flow of those tides of attachment comes the oscillation of our emotional sensibilities as our heart empties and then fills.
We were born with tender hearts – warm, sensitive, open, innocent, and vulnerable. Hearts that were sweet, curious, infinite, abundant, that had no rules and knew no bounds – filled with dreams, desires, hopes, and aspirations.
At some point in our life, our sweet tender heart experienced a sadness – an expectation unmet, a loss of something or someone, an understanding turned on its head, a belief contradicted, or a violence perpetrated. The natural response would have been to shut down and protect the heart in any way we could. The steps you took to heal that wound or prevent it from ever happening again may have blurred the boundaries of where your vulnerability ends and your love begins.
To maintain that protection, we continued to cover the wound with thicker layers of defense so we would never again experience the hurt, the pain, the sadness. But in that process, we stop ourselves from feeling, we shield ourselves from letting love in, and we deaden the possibility of falling in love yet again.
So here we are in this precious, sacred moment. And what shall we do with it? Live our lives in this constriction or open our hearts once more and risk the pain of heartbreak once more?
The American author Anais Nin wrote,
And the day came
when the risk it took
to remain tight inside the bud
was more painful
than the risk it took
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If right here, right now, we are willing to give our heart permission to open and let just a sliver of love come inside, we can begin a transformational shift towards happiness.
We look around and see all the baggage of the past, the pain of what is no longer, and the tear-drenched pillowcase and we think that’s all there is…that we can never love again, feel love again, give love again. But that’s just a thought…just a silly thought that is based only in the fear that we will once again be hurt.
Life is magnificent out there. What has happened is carved in stone – but you are never stuck. You always have the ability to take a step towards love, towards wholeness, towards the thing you are most entitled to – happiness.
Ruminate on these lines by Rumi from The Essential Rumi translated by Coleman Barks & John Moyne.
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
Today – just today…see how wide you can open your heart…see how far you can blossom. Join me on Hay House today and we’ll lock in the LOVE!! And stay tuned for this weekend’s meditation on love. Peace. -davidji