“There is something in every one of you that waits and listens for the sound of the genuine in yourself. It is the only true guide you will ever have. And if you cannot hear it, you will all of your life spend your days on the ends of strings that somebody else pulls.” –Howard Thurman
Hello Spiritual Warrior! And welcome to another Life Tool – Mastering Your Emotions.
We live each moment of our life through the ebb and flow of emotions. It’s almost as if each beat of our heart, and every breath we take, move us in one direction or another. The phone rings – a feeling sparks, and a thought pours in; someone says something to us – suddenly our mood shifts and our face follows; we feel the sun on our cheek and the wind in our hair – and as memories awaken, a sensation ripples through us. We are a bundle of conditioned emotions that are primed to respond to the momentary assessment of whether our needs have been met or not.
Simply put emotions are subjective, conscious experiences that link our interpretation of a given moment to a biological reaction creating a particular mental state. Have you ever yelled at someone -after having a tough time or a difficult encounter- over something that had nothing to do with them? Psychologists refer to this mis-direction as “emotional leakage.” When you suppress emotions, you’re likely to express them inadvertently in other avenues by being snide, sarcastic, snarky, retaliatory, biting, harsh, or downright mean to people who had nothing to do with your initial frustration. Suppressing our feelings is now scientifically proven to lead to poor memory, relationship challenges, and deeper health issues as our body is influenced so strongly by our subjective conscious experiences.
We can rise above the constriction by heightening our emotional intelligence, known as EI in many leadership, psychology, and philosophy circles. EI is essentially our ability to “own” these four capabilities:
1. Correctly perceive emotions
2. Retrieve and produce emotions to assist thought
3. Comprehend emotions and understand them, and
4. Effectively adjust emotions to promote personal development and growth
If you don’t know how you feel or why you feel a certain way, you will experience emotional overwhelm or confusion and won’t be able to communicate effectively, meet your needs, or resolve disagreements. But if we master our emotional intelligence, you will flow with less stress, more grace, and greater ease. And, the more successful we are at heightening these core skill sets, the happier and more fulfilled we will be.
The beauty of EI is that it’s not a function of simply being born with a high EQ; emotional intelligence can be learned, developed, and mastered. Although daily intelligence is important to succeeding in life, emotional intelligence is key to achieving your goals. Remember, EI is an awareness of your actions and feelings – and how they affect those around you. It also means that you value others, listen to their wants and needs, and are able to empathize or identify with them on many different levels. In this process, YOU WILL MEET MORE OF YOUR OWN NEEDS!
After teaching more than 200,000 people the secrets of emotional awareness, I began integrating these teachings into all of my workshops and Teacher Trainings. I encourage you to join me at one of my retreats, workshops, or Teacher Trainings & in the meantime, start to meditate with me each week and together we will transcend the emotional turbulence in our lives.
I’ll see you on the gap!! Peace. -davidji